iloveyou

Sick&Tired

2010-05-25T15:46:00.003+08:00

You never knew how I feel even when you said you did.

No one ever did.

Wee~ I'm blogging. HAHAS.

Blog seriously can lie alot.

Cuz the way I type I seem hyper but I'm not.

HAHAHS!

Anyways, this is gonna be a short one.

Gotta do bloody maths. Ass~

Why rush sia, the rest of the classes also haven finish -.-

Wanted to go training to vent my anger but I'm so tired to.

& I don't think I can finish maths in time.

I miss training. Gahhhhhhs~

I had HAI Olympics today.

& it sucked the hell out of me.

My school is screwed so ya.

Win 2 games also no use-.-

Then play so hard for what.

Den I have screwed up teachers that dun care.

Let the students take charge den still screwed even more.

Gahhhs~

Stupid school sia. Haiz.

So ya, that's just about it :D

At I think it is.

Ehhhhs, still got monday.HAHAS.

I went to science center.

Gahhhs~ Was stuck in e jam for an hr plus.

WTH.So we missed alot of things.

but still okayyys larhhhs

Run around awhile den go listen talk.

HAHAS!Den back to school.

Camp At AISHAH'S. Den go back school.

CIP thingy thingy.

Den home.

Now it's all it.

Tmr CIP in class. Boring.

Report books coming in soon (: ):
Ya, both excited and unwilling to collect ):

You will get through it, Crystal.

I know it.

I seriously don't understand why. Why me?

I'm the reason for everything.

Good or bad, still me.

I didn't choose to be her apple of eye.

All I did was to do my best.

I just wanna be 15,the kid being rebellious.

Yeah, now I'm like a fucking poly kid w no freedom. Gahhhs.

Why do I have to grow beyond my age.

I'm so sick and tired of this.

Trying so hard makes so many things so complicated.

I wanna sleep and think right.

I dun wanna wake up and say.

There's school.

There's training.

Omg I forgot to do something.

I just wannalie back enjoy life for e moment.

But in mylife now I can't take a breather.

So tired. I get weaker and weaker.

What's going on in my life?

And some strange reason.

I can't cry for certain things until wells. ya.

Haiz. LSTTM.

You know what, you are a fucking bitch I'm not saying this in the fucking msg because i dun wanna fucking hurt you. you fucking never ever know. never did and never will. I swear. You say i never think yet you never even see what the hell is behind the msg. You don't get what I'm trying to say fine larhhhs. Like I care. I helped u cannot see not my fault. Done my best tried already don't get it not my bloody asshole fault. You never see myefforts cuz u always carried the hatred in me that i'm the apple of eye. You can have the fucking thing. I dun wan it. For all I care. This isn't even what I want.

TakeTheHintAlready

2010-05-20T19:07:00.005+08:00

Enough of the nonsense, You don't know me.

So, here's the deal. I don't wanna make the effort.

I an't falling for the sweet talks 'cause it's spooking me out.

Hints given, take it or leave it.

No harm done to me.

Okayyys, So I haven been updating my blog for like.

A month plus. Wow, I've been lazy.

OKayyys, actually not.

Was mapling, den mugging.

And recently training ):

It's seriously taken a toll on me.

GAHHHHHHHS~

Let's see if I can rmb what happened.

Okayyys, I don't rmb at all.

I remember going out w flo and family.

TAKING LOTS AND LOTS OF PHOTO.

Celebrating TeacherChris birthday.

EXAMS!

Inter-school :/

Exams.

Holidays.

School.

Outing w florence, ben, justin, me.

School.

Should be around like this timeline bas.

Ya so, I have another competition coming.

And I don't wanna do it.

It's killing me.

Life kinda sucks.

Exams, busy do notes.

Exams over, still need do bloody maths.

I wanna take a break also no mood.

I also have aholes who love to disturb at the wrong time.

My bro had an operation and now his school is screwed.

Okayyys, so ya.Basically I also feel screwed.

I hate maths and physics.

Omg, I can't believe I can do humans.

I failed my awesome english.

And yeah, That's my awesome life.

I aint replying you cuz you help me settle the dam bloody thing that i wanna settle. And well, it ani't what i wanted so, t's not helping me at all. Yeah, that's f-ing irritating. I wanna shout to you and say heys, that's my life. but what i respect you so it's time you learn to respect me. And about he,heys, stop messing w my friends. enough of your nonsense. I WUN BLOODY BE W YOU. Geez. I can't be, the sparks aint right. as guilty as i am. sorry. accept the fact and leavv my bloody screwed life. GAHHHHS~

TiredOfUnfairnessInLife

2010-04-14T17:31:00.005+08:00

Tears stream down my cheek, I'm so tired of life.

It's been ages since I tried to take an emo picture.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAS!

Anyways back to life.

I've been damn at the wrong mood recently.

Saturday, 10042010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ER JIE!

YUPYUP!

Hahas, spent the morning mapling.

Den afternoon go to ice-skating!

FUNFUN!

Had dinner @ pastamania.

Went home.

Use com awhile, sleep.

Sunday, 11042010

GRADING! OMFG!

Woke up @ 730 when meeting the rest @ 730 -.-

Rushed! Left, met, GO!

I screwed the effing thing.

I SWEAR I FUCKING DID!

Dam bloody sad.

Cried awhile, run awhile, eat, went inside.

After awhile my bloody sister ask me Inot going home arhhs?

She ASK A DAM BLOODY FUCKING STUPID QUESTION!

Since when I ever go home alone when she's dere?

FUCK YOU! GOT BOYFRIEND DEN LIKE THAT!

BIG DEAL~!

Cried all my way home. Took train from Kovan to Eunos

Took bus to Aljunied.

Take train to Pasir Ris den to Eunos, den to pasir ris.

Den go beach.

Sat there for an hr plus den go grandma house.

BOUGHT MY BOOOKS! FINALLY!

Monday, 12042010

School usual.

Grammar test during AP.

Go for training.

ADMIN WORK!

Daddy fetch me home.

Do hw,play com awhile.

Nice nice bed.

Tuesday,13042010

School usual.

Maths AP!

Physics extra class.

Waited for AISHAH's bro.

Stupid argument.

HOME!

Read finish DearJohn.

Camwhored w BabyyCarebear&GreenBobo.

Slept!

Wednesday, 14042010

HAPPY BIRTHDY AHMAD (FLEA)!

School. Lunch.

HATE A FOOL!

Geez, Retardness.

Home. Blog.

Going to start on homework liaos.

That's just about my day.

I wanted to rant abt the sad part of me,but I'm lazy to type.

Buaiiiis, gotta eat steamboat w family & start on hw.

YouAllMakeMeSmileWhenI'mDown

2010-04-10T11:00:00.005+08:00

You'll never know how much I smile for you.

Been dam tired recently.

My eye bag seems very bad.

Hmmms. But I can't slp.

Yay,me blogging.

I actually have alot to blog des.

But very very very the lazy sia.

Friday, 02042010

Stayed home all day.

Went training.

Dam tired.

Saturday, 03042010

Stayed home all day again.

Did homework.

Played commie.

Sunday, 04042010

Played commie awhile in the morning.

Bathed, go my mother side de gradma.

Help to burn stuff.

Read book, watch teevee.

Fell asleep, wake up, sleep.

Dinner, hommie.

Bed!

Monday, 05042010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, VANEH!

School. Training.

Home, card, bathe, eat.

Rushed to meet ZH.

Go 'suprise' vaneh.

Stay awhile, eat, talk.

Send ZH home.

Go back, watch teeveee playyyy.

Home. Chiong history bedddie!

Tuesday, 06042010

School. Lunch.

I think I did running and coughed like mad after that.

Horrible. Something was like stuck in my throat.

I forgot what happened actually.

HAHAS.

Wednesday, 07042010

Happy Birthday RAIHAN.

HAHAAS! Hmmms.

School. Lunch.

I still actually forgot.-.-

Thursday, 08042010

Hmmms, School. AP.

NE meeting. HORRIBLE ):

HOMMIE!!!!

Friday, 09042010

School, Lunch.

ORAL! I swear I did badly.

Cries. Hommie.

Played commie.

Eat, change, TKD.

Hommie & tired.

OMG! This is just about the week larhhhhhhhhs.

HAHAHS!

If only everyone can make me feel the way you do.

The one that I feel you could understand me.

Maybe being able to read my mind aint that bad.

At least when I don't feel like talking you'll know what to do.

You know , you give me that weird feelings.

You're like him and another him.

Which makes you.

I wonder how my heart is.

Wonder whether she's alright.

She seems tired recently.

Not willing to do anything.

She nearly made me could not breathe while taking class.

Yupsyups. Dun die on me kayyys?

I feel so guilty.

I can't be there when you need me the most.

I can't even comfort you like last time.

I no longer can be there.

I don't feel so twinish anymore.

Like we have so much diff all of e sudden.

OMG! I'm guilty of so much things.

Hate my heart. Geez.

ANYWAYS, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ERRRRRRRRRR JIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

BeThatGuyWithTheCrazyGlueGun

2010-04-03T13:18:00.006+08:00

Now is you need me & not I need you ; Cause someone replaced you in my heart.

Was browsing through my old posts.

Came across this post & decide to reblog this.

I'm still like this. Although some parts already not.

Here it goes:

She smiles to hide her tears,
Laughs to cover her fears.
But when the day is over,
When the night has come,
Her mask is off,
The show is done.

Forever I will love you.
Forever I will care.
Forever you will be the one.
Even if your not there.

Betrayal Is Inevitable.
Yet you must not block yourself off from the world in fear of betrayal.
If you do that you will only feel the pain of betraying yourself.

There's always gonna be that one person,
That no matter what they do,
What they say,
Or how much times they have hurt you.
You just cant let them go.
Because they mean so much to you.

No one knew she was pretending all along.
She faked the happiness,
& said nothing was wrong.
Looking in the mirror,
She sees a broken smile.
Striving for perfection.
The girl is just tired of all this rejection.

What would you say if I asked you not to go?
To forget everyone, to forget everything?
& start over with me.
Will you take my hand & never let me go?
Promise me you'll never let me go?

I m A Girl Whose Heart Has Been Broken & Put Back Together By A Guy With A Crazy Glue Gun. And Was Always Able 2 Make It Look New.

(Will you be willing to be that guy with the crazy gluegun?)

ThankYou.

2010-04-02T13:26:00.004+08:00

You told time will heal everything. I'm gonna believe you.

Life has been a total rollor coaster ride.

I broke up w * alr.

Wells, It was my fault, so ya.

& my mood swings seems to be getting worser.

Anyways, I shall blog about muah life.

Nothing much though.

Saturday, 20022010

Went to see my juniors compete.

Was kinda a long day.

But still okayyys.

All got medals.

2bronze, 1silver.

Ate dinner w WeiLin&bro @ subway.

Den homesweethome.

Sunday, 21032010

Went to see my juniors & seniors fight.

Same & longer day.

Ended up with ehhhhhs.

2broze, 2 silvers, 1 gold.

Yupyup.

Went home earlier.

Mapled awhile den went to bed.

Monday,22032010

Gahhhhhhs, back to school alr.

Kinda happy yet not really.

Actually, I forgot what happened.

I think I attended training.

Tuesday, 23032010

I still forgot what happen.

Wednesday, 24032010

STM! I cannot rmb at all!

Thursday, 25032010

Ehhhhhhhs. Shyt what happened?

Errrrs, I only rmbering staying back to take test.

Friday, 26032010

I forgot what happened in school.

But AISHAH, CNYXM, LawlLiet, Odell and me ate lunch.

Den hangout at palyground.

Talked till forgot time.

Den 6 den left.

Hurry rush back go home den change go training.

Go training.

After class train self-defence.

& finally got it.

Geeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzz.

Saturday, 27032010

Bored at home

Did nothing.

Sunday, 28032010

Went to help mama&papa @ market.

Den home.

See zhongyi.

Den home again.

Went to grandma place.

My cousin bully me!

Den home.

Monday, 29032010

Cannot rmb what happened in school.

Forgot to bring gee to train.

So slack.

DIXON I HATE YOU.

Denhelped cher to do something dumb.

Tuesday, 30032010

I cannot rmb a thing.

I think we all stayed back for AP.

Go through maths, do corrections den leave.

Wednesday, 31032010

Why can't I just rmb what happen?

Hmmmmmmms.

There was SpeechDay.

Went to have lunch w AISHAH, Odell, Lina, Raihan.

Den hanged arnd BK.

Odell went home.

Den we went to WS. Bought My book.

Walk arnd.

In the end went to school, just in time.

Stayed through the programmeees.

Went home.

Bus, mrt, bus, I took the bus home.

STUPID21, Keep 1 deck):

Wayne accompanied me.

We kinda talk & stuff.

So it ain't that hard.

Den bus-ed back.

Walked home.

On Com, charge phone, bathed, maths, slp.

Tired ttm.

Thursday, 01042010

It was april fool.

Didn't get pranked.

Okayyys, maybe once.

Hmmmmmmms.

Had a long talk after school.

Mut&minah talk that I dun get it.

But yas.

Met WeiLin @ MRTSATTION.

Bus-ed home w her(:

Ohh, ohhh.

Pe Did running, died.

Notreally but ya.

Friday, 02042010

I'm stuck @ home.

Wished I ran out todayyyys.

Haiz.

Life sucks.

Okayyys, this bascially it.

I wanted to rant about the other side of my life.

But wells. I'm so tired of trying to explain this part of life.

Thanks for hearing me that day.

I've alr been trying to get him outta me alr.

The totalbastard.

ihadthatweirdfeelinginme.

whatshouldido?

whatthehellamithinking.

Me.

2010-03-20T11:06:00.005+08:00

I wish I could have my rainbow after every pain.

I have no idea why I'm blogging nows.

But just let me be kayyyyyyyyyyys.

HAHAHS!

For some reasons.

I feel my heart runnning wild.

I'm doing so wrong.

It should not be like this.
Love is so complicated.

I hate my feelings.

My character.

The way I am.

Anyways, If got time I shall blog a couple of songgggggssssss!

HAHAS!

Buaiiiiiisssss My Fiiiiiiiine Readers(:

HAHAS.

Update!

2010-03-20T00:16:00.005+08:00

When life gets harder each time, an angel passes by & makes it all better.

Okayys, I know I haven been updating my blog & stuff.

I was lazy kayyys.

Anyways back to life kayyyyys.

HAHAS!

Hmmms, I shall be honest here kayyys.

But I'll start with how was my life.

HAKKAIDO TRIP

Snowing almost everyday, the awesome snow!

HAHAS!

Florence was officially attached to me there too!

HEHES!

The place there was quite okayys toooooos!

Okayyys, actually I'm just crapping.

I kinda forgot what i did there-.-

Ohhhhhhhs, I fell off while playing the snow mobile ):

I caused my sister to have a cut on her lips.

WHILE I WAS LAUGHING MY WAY!

HAHAS. I'm ebvil!

I was so sorry kayyys.

I didn't really missed much of lessons, so it was okayyyyys.

I missed alot of anypaosssss though.

HAHAS! Managed to catch up faster den i thought I would XP

SCHOOL!

THIS IS SO FAWESOME! hahas.

Life been great in school.

Still making fun with same ppl with AISHAH getting bored @ it (:

HAHAS! RYTE AISHAH?

HAHAS.Missed quite alot of gossips so couldn't rlly understand @ 1st.

But yassss.

I came back to schoool just nice for another maths chap.

Otherrrrs never missed much (:

SO GOOOOOOOOODS!

hahas.

Nothing makes my day better w peeps(:

HOLIDAYS

I've been busy.
Sat went out with flo to find ben @ IT fair.Regrettttttttted ttm. Shall not say whhy.
Sun went to stay @ hotel
Quite okayyys larhhhs.
Swum with my very pain leg due to the day b4.
Mon went to school for physics lesson& tkd training.
WOKE WAYNE UP! YAY ME! I MADE MR LIM HAPPY!
Cuz he say he'll be happy if wayne, kevin & some other person will come(:
YAY! HAHAS. Training the same, den went home.
Tues went to nyp.
Job given & done asap! HAHAS!WE'RE A SUPER TEAM! Did homework!

Wayne went to pierce his ear & it freaked me!

Wed went to interview a industry person.

den nyp to do report etc.

Dizzzzzzzzyyyyyyyyy from taxi trip!

Thurs we went to disturb ppl by askingthem to do surveyyyyys!

hahas! Attacked the Tam library & white sands!

Den Ikea. PHOTOS IN FACEBOOK.

Friday went out with wayne to do hw which failed cuz he didn't do.

Den walk arnd, den go lan.

FIRST TIME I GO LAN SIA!

Dizzzzzyyyyyyy like crazy.

Was having this headache from climbing the stairs that i thought i would fall.

& it lasted to know.

Den wayne sent me to eunos den I go home.

Den training.

Sat&Sun going to support my juniors in tournoment(however it's spelt)!

Busy sia, where got holiday ):

HAIXZXZXZXZXZXZXZXZXZXZ.

Awesome life, with times I get real depressed.
Hahas. Shall talk about the sad part of life tooo.

Like a said,If you have feelings for two at the same time,
It means that you don't love the first that much as you should.
I'm having that feelings.

I think you deserve someone better than me.

Someone who loves you like you do to her.

Had been having this feeling alr.

Our start was already a mistake.

You were once my regret,& now I'm back to square one.

I don't know how much this is gonna affect you.

But I guess it's better than cheating you.

& I once said that you remind me of ppl.

I meant was my bastard ex.

I can't stand how similar you guys are.

I want to leavethis nightmare yet it comes back to me through you.

So sorry for wasting your time all these while.

Thanks for letting me know that you can be there for me.

But I guess maybe we aren't right for each other.

We're just worlds apart alr.

With love,

Crystal

I sat down, I've been thinking.
MY life always just repeats. Since Sec1.

Life been the same.

It's the same cycle with diff ppl,

Although some same ppl but diff positions.

I think life gotta change abit.

I gotta stop and think awhiles. I need life.

If I told you I had two feelings for you & YOU.

Would you believe? I know what I want.

But I don't want to go for it.

Nothing can me happy again.
Not even TKD can help me vent my anger.

HELP ME!

Let me be that lil girl from my memories. That girl that was protected by all, the one w/o worries and all she had to do was to smile. I hate how I handle my life now. I keep repeating the same mistakes. So what if I meet nice & right guys, are they what I really want, what I really need? I need my motivation, my drive. I need someone who can make me do all these. I need someone who is willing to play all these childish games with me & feel like a samll kid again. I need someone to push me to do things I have to. I need someone who can make me do things I used to do. I lost it all. Even if mdms there, I just couldn't do. Everyone is improving & I'm deproving.

I JUST WANNA BE THAT SMALL GIRL, WITHOUT ALL THESE TO WORRY.

Thanks, Rawr.

2010-02-12T22:55:00.005+08:00

Thanks for everything that happened today, it made my day once again.

HAPPY VDAY & CNY!
HappyVday to all my couple friends. LAST LONG~
HappyVday to all my love ones. iwillalwaysloveyouall(:
Anyways, thanks to those who gave me vday's gift.
ILOVETHEMALL!(alot of sweets though)
Sorry couldn't get you guys something.Wanted to, but very lazy larhhs):
Maybe the last year or very belated, which meant after I COME BACK FROM HAKKAIDO!

Shall get back to my life.
School has been still okayys I guess nothing much, still pretty much the same.
After school meeting was awesome.
Have been meeting Jon after sch recently.
He have been hanging out w me&peeps lately.
Went for training on Monday, AMAZINGLY!
Something happen to Javen on the. Okayy, I forgot when.
Then there was a PRP trip. VERY FUN! but had sand everywhere):
Did not like it. After that had reunion dinner @ mum's side de grandma.
Okayys larhhs.Came back super tired though.
Today had the concert. IT WAS STILL OKAYYS.
Not bad larhhs. Study the whole day, no half day):
Anyways, time passed quite fast. Soon, the peeps when to eat seoulgarden, A&ZX went hm.
Me&Jon went to watch movie. PercyJackson&theLighteningThief, i think.
The show okayys larhhs, was kinda tired though. Sorry.
After that when leaving saw peeps -.- Such a coincidence.
After that we parted,Jon send me hm, they go PRP again.
(Jon keep pestering me to eat todays by asking me what I wanna eat.)

Okayys. BTW, to tell peeps who do not know or I lie to.
I'm sorry, but I'm attached alr. Sweetly attached to this guy whom I know he will love me like I would towards him. Don't think need me mention who ler bas.
(I wonder ZH knows abt it anots. hmms.)

Buaiis Humans.
Wish me safe trip to HAKKAIDO. I'll miss humans here): & lots of lessons): Lastly, Pray I don't freeze to death in HAKKAIDO.
p.s. I'll be away from the 15th-22nd.
p.s.s SUPER SORRY WEILIN!

MaybeYou'reNotBadAfterAll

2010-02-07T23:19:00.004+08:00

Understand?

Somebody ask me to update my blog.

So here I am. I shall update lorhhs.

& now he is chasing me to slp. So wonderful.

I kinda forgot what happened.

Hmms. Last week quite tiring, everyday so late den reach home.

Was busy doing the board. & Hanging arnd w Peeps! DUH!

HAHAS! Life would suck w/o them, mans.

RAWR~

I had those gossips wif peeps. SO AWESOME!

ZX is like dam funny (: I swear I didn't know he was tt kind(:

Javen too. "I want to know the adress, TELL ME!"

Pester me lyk siao. (So can you like gib me the adress so he wun pester me): )

Had the so awesome dayz(:

These are kinda what happen from tues to thurs(:

Monday went to nyp. I died!

Okayys, Not really. Our mentor looks alright.

But becuz of this, I can't go for camps&chalet during the march&juneholis):

Friday was awesome!

I went out with FLORENCE! & Jonathan(:

Fianlly met Flo. Missed her liked mad mans.

We were not suppose to meet so who cares.

But I missed that day de class spirit thing for the CNY.

Thanks to Peeps tt helped with e NE BOARD!

Sorry for being so irresponsible.

Florence made me walk like mad.

BTW, I dun think you know.

It was so amazing I could recognise Jonathan the moment he walked out!I'M SO AWESOME!

Florence was like "You sure?" HAHAS! I RAWK!

HAHAS! Met Jon, Florence started blabbering. I joined. Jon was as usual so quiet.

Den Flo say wan go PS. So go take mrt, flo suddenly ask, "Why you two always nv talk de?"

*Turn to jon* "Hie!" *Jon reply* "Hello!" All laugh. HAHAS!

Den flo nth to say liaos(: HAHAS!

She made me walk arnd looking for a shop that she can't find.

Finally gave up,went to spotlight.

Made me walk arnd to find what she want. Den found, saw another thing, interested buy,etc.

Den play at the wooden area thingy. It was MENTAL! They seemed like no childhood. But ver funny larhhs.

CHASIER, HOME! Florence decided to pangseh me&jon.

So he went home w me. Flo took the other train.

Talked all the way home. etc.

Den reach home, slack awhile, den prepare go tkd.

Den go late, tkd slack like hell.

Ya larhhs. HAHAS! ~end of friday~

(p.s. Did I mention I died with florence super horny mind!)

Sat&Sun:

Stayed home all day. Sat do finish hw, KUDOS ME.

Den youtube whole night while somebody was so slow at replying me.

etc. Sunday I STONED THE ENTIRE MORNING & AFTERNOON.

I was close to death. Almost died ):Nobody entertained me):

Someone was so busy slping): OKayys larhhs, dun blame you.

Suppose to go my popo's(mother side) house to wash daddy's car, But tired so nv go.

So stayed home, Mummy go wash her hair @ salon, Jojie buy food.

Eat finish, My maid say hammie's all stink.

Then I say throw them away, She really wanted too):

So ended washing the cages with her(:

(I only left with 6hammies alr): Sorry.)

Updated my blog! There you go! Didn't mention alot of you though.

Like how we got arnd etc.

GottenOverFast

2010-01-31T09:47:00.005+08:00

Thanks for being there for me.

Thanks to those who comforted me etc, asking me whether I was alright.

Btw, I'm handling it pretty fine.

I know I can survive without him, like he can do without me.

This time I'm not putting on a brave front.

Because before he said breakup, I discovered like the 10thousands secrets. HAHAS.

Anyways, Thanks Javen&AISHAH for spamming my inbox(:

AISHAH,CHARMAINE,LINA for cheering me up all over again.

Charmaine for spreading the news.

FLORENCE for hearing me talk things out.

WEILIN&JIENING for making my tkd life better that day(:

Should be just it.

One more maybe.

JONATHAN for talking to me etc. [which through it found out something-.-]

Btw,I wanted to change blogskins but lazy find larhhs.

So ended up changing photos nias.

& a few edites here&there.

Okayys. Back to sch.

My group got choosen to go NYP to do ProjectI.

I wanna gib up on doing the deco, but decided not to larhhs.
Got appointed Chairman for the TKD club.

Making fun for *&*in class with AISHAH.

& Okayys, many more.

Hating * more & more each time.

* did alot of stupid things.

Camwhored like mad on friday after everything happened.

[To view the photos: Go to facebook.]

Should just be all of it.

(* is like not only one person.)

Buaiis. & I'm seriously fine.

I'm smiling & getting on with life perfectly fine (:

YouBrokeMyGlassHeart

2010-01-28T19:51:00.004+08:00

I can say people about their love life, But I always never managed mine well.

Todays gonna be an emo post instead of an total update of my life.

I don't get it.

Maybe I went overthe board.

But I justdon't wanna talk abt it!

I don't want it to be like the other time we had a talk.

It sucked the hell outta of me!

I read through your msges.

I let my tears held back.

I came across one, that told me that the last thing you'll ever do was to hurt me.

&I think it's true.

Cuz I think it's the last time I'm gonna let you do this to me.

The last time I'm gonna let myself do this to myself.

I want to tell youWe're over.

Yet I dont wanna let you go.

Because of that last msg.

It reminded me of Jason&ZhengWei.

I rmbed that I lost them because of *.

Now I'm losing you because you said that I have my friends.

Even seeing the blank inbox&sentmessages.

Sends tears rolling down.

Why are guys such a bastard?

I don't get it):

I HATE MY FUCKING LIFE! I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!

I HATE IT TO THE FUCKING CORE!

EverythingWillBeFine

2010-01-23T22:52:00.006+08:00

Each time I fight with you, I'll bluff myself that I'm going to be just fine without you.

School has been hectic.

Like Hw hw& still hw.

Deprived of a day free.

Even my weekend so packed.

Today rush hw.

Tmr go TKD.

Tt busy. Cries):

School has been long.I eveytime finish 1st sub of the day, thought it was recess alr.

Yeah that's how long the day is. VERY VERY VERY tired.

But the dayz spent with 2e3'09 just brighten my day(:

Had those talks with the guys.

Play with the peeps. Really makes me look forward to the day.

Those laughters,The noise, I miss them so much.

Feel so calm&happy with them.

I really appreciate those times(:

Monday was a drag. I forgot what happen. hmms.

Oh I went to eat pizza with syed, rian& AISHAH! had an awesome lunch.

Then met peeps den home sweet home.

Tuesday was still a drag. Okayy I really forgot.

Wednesday. Stll forget. I suck-.-

Thursday. Hmms. Eers. Okayys I still forget.

Friday. Went to do ic, den slacked in school awhile.

Went to eat mian den go to sch watch match awhile.

Den went playground with lina,leon,L,berry&javen&zx.

After that javen&zx go 1st while we wait for abel who took dam bloody long.

Had a couples of talks and laughters.

It takes my mind off alot of stuff.

btw, thanks berry,L&leon for accompanying me all the way till eunos. den only the went back to simei.

Thanks so much(: Had a pleasant day with u guys(:

Oh.& CHARMAINEwas back in sch. &P came to do her ic(:

OKayys. done with updating. shall not like rant the sad part of my life.

NewBlogkin

2010-01-16T20:55:00.004+08:00

I changed my blogskin. Spent the whole afternoon on it-.-

Took me a long time to choose then decided to use this though plain. but still okayy larhhs.

I put my twitter on liaos(: No moreplurk):

I think I'm getting sick. & that's bad.

Rawr, No sick plss.

Let's talk about school.

I shall list my teachers(:

FormTeacher - MsKu

Co-formTeacher- Ms Chua

English - MrsChan

A&EMaths - MsNg & MrGng

Physics - Mr Lim & idk the name of the other-.- I phail.

Chemistry - I forgot the name-.-

Chinese - WuLaoShiMen

SocialStudies - MdmKang

EHistory - dk-wad- Tan

PGeography - MsKu

CME - MsKu&MsChua

I think that's all.

Anyways. Hmms. All my teachers are quite awesome.

Except a couple of them.

Lessons so far still okay.

Life is also so far okayys.

E&AMaths is okay as long as I have a little help here&there.

Though initially is hard larhhs.

Others are still okayy larhhs.

Slept in chem 1st lesson-.-

Anyways. everything else is okay.

Taekwondo is perfect to.

Though injuries here&there.

But I'm fine(:

Glad I managed to survived(:

Lazy to type liaos larhhs. Buaiis humans.

Lyrics

2010-01-05T19:44:00.005+08:00

VANILLIA TWILIGHT.

By: OwlCity

DedicatedTo: Dearest

The stars lean down to kiss you,

And I lie awake and miss you.

Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere.

'cause I'll doze off safe&soudly,

But I'll miss your arms around me.

I'd send you a postcard to you dear,

'cause I wish you were here.

I'll watch the night turn light blue,

But it is not the same without you,

'cause it takes two to whisper quietly.

The silence isn't so bad,

Till I look at my hands&feel sad,

'cause the spaces between my fingers,

Are right where yours fingers fit perfectly.

I'll find repose in new ways,

Though I haven't sleep in two days,

'cause cold nostalgia chills me to bone.

But drenched in vanilla twlight,

I'll sit on the front pouch all night,

Waist deep in thought because when I think of you,

I don't feel so alone.

I dont feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.

As many times as I blink, I'll think of you... TONIGHT.

I'll think of you tonight.

When violet eyes get brighter,

And heavy wings grow lighter,

I'll taste the sky and feel alive again.,

And I'll forget the world that I knew,

But I swear I won't forget you.
Oh if my voice could reach back through the past,

I'd whisper in your ear,

Oh darling, I wish you were here.

Captains & Cruise Ships

By: OwlCity

DedicatedTo: Florence&me XD

I am stuck in L.A. through the week & can't get away.

& you're alone on the pier, in the West Palm Beach, on your holiday.

Stromy nights, re-awake the stomachahe ache, that I've acquired.

From feeling down, things look grim and I'm so sick , of being tired.

Apartment lights go dark and it's depressing but what can I do?

Midnight streets feel dead, when I am so used to driving with you.

Brighter lights fill the nights & bluer skies reflect in your eyes.

As I inspect & analyze all these dreams, I don't reconigze.

If you're still up, when the ship, in the port, prepare to set sail.

Comb the beach, & put those blue, flowers up in your ponytail.

Inside my head, your voice is still resounding but what can I do?

The empty rooms feel cold when I am so used to being with you.

Count the stars, watch the waves, absorb the summer sun and think of me.

When you explore hidden coves and tiny island chains throughout the sea.

Can u still hear my voice, when I'm outside, over the phone?

For what it is worth darling dear, I wish were you were here, 'cause I feel alone

When you were home, wed sing but since you've left I don't hear anything.

And though I feel so sad, I can't believe things are really that bad.

Old captian & brand new cruise ships,

Sailing over the briny sea.

When I carshed my beloved desk job,

& swim through the debris.

I'll cut lose & leave this madhouse,

Bound for the alantic blue.

I'll stroll down your tree-line driveway,

And sail the ocean with you.

West Coast Friendship

By: OwlCity

DedicatedTo: All my friends out there XD [I mean all!]

Are you out there

Where the rainy days begin

To feel rather sad

And the walls are closing in

Like the darkness around me

It's so hard to look away

When they daylight doesn't ever stay

Above this dull apartment view

Oh I will surround you

It's quite clear that i'm stuck here

So I'll devise a plan

And cut out a door in my new living room

The porch light is so bright

That I'll quietly sneak down the dark metal shape

Of the rusty fire escape

I bought a one way ticket

'cause I knew I'd never see the ground

Unless I was aboard a jet plane

And we were going down

When I wiped the tears from my eyes

The warm water took me by suprise

And I woke up beside the ocean

I realized I must be in California

I must be in California

The new year is out here

And I will make a lovely list

Of your charms

So I'll never feel alone in your arms

I must in California

IDon'tCareAnymore!

2010-01-05T18:19:00.004+08:00

Today the sce1s SUCKS!
I had the worse sia.
Haix.Today is my worse day of 2010.
Although it has only been 5dayz.
Wells. Morning was great.
Had the 10thousands laughter w the guys&AISHAH!
Followed by the stupid test.
Which I did not finish-.-
Then was the sec1 cca thing.
Dun wanna talk bout it):
Met my dearest after sch.
He sent me home den went for work.

Sometimes I stop&think.

Why the 1st impressions I give ppl is that I'm scary&emo.

Maybe becuz I hab beenlike that in primarysch.

I still rmb.

When I was in the first 3yrs of pri sch.

I locked myself in the study rm.

Took my kindergarten pic&cried for my friends to join me.

I rmb I feel solonely.

Nobody was there for me.

Well, this is something nobody knew.

I started writing diaries about my life.

I always thought you know maybe.

Maybe someone would spot me behind the mask.

Maybe someone wouldtalk to me bout it.

But nobody came.

Even if they did, they kinda made me felt worse):

& I also lost contact wif flo.

Life to me was like hell!

If I was living a life like this, who would n't be so protective?

Maybe my childhood was everything.

But it was ruined.

Not to mention my up&downs with shumei.

If you were in my shoes, you'll really know was was last min.

Iknew about the bbq just dayz b4 it is actually gonna happen.

There was a moment I swear I thought it was going to be cancelled.

That's why I nv follow up.

Take it as it was my fault.

But seriously.

It's not my totally my fault.

Sorry that I hurt you&stuff.

sorry that i locked myself away.

But it was my childhood.

I longed for protection.

I really needed it.

That's why I'm so tomboyish.

BecauseI had to protect myself since noone was there for me.

It was only me. I grew up in that world.

I never trusted others but only me.

Till florence came back to my life.

She made me rmb my happy part of my childhood.

Maybe that's why she was able to enter my world.

'cause during that, I knew I had only she to rely on.

She went through to that moment w me.

Though I didn't cut myself tt time but.

Just imagine being lied over&overagain.

Even if you weren't the 1, I would be wary of every single person.

Amazgingly I do analyzing on the 1st timemeet.

I rmb, I never carry a smile on my 1st day of school. EVER SINCE.

I tried letting many others enter my life.

But I can'topen in the end cuz. They can't readmy mind.

& apprently onli Florence could do it.

AMAZINGLY.

I'm always blaming myself.

Keeping everything in my heart.

It gets heavier&heavier.

ME,Me,Me. I always thought it was mie.

I still rmb our fite in sec1 nov/dec holi.

Rmb. Ialways thought it was me.

&no matter wad, I told myself.

I had to put a brave front&say they were right so I can't do anything.

Till since florence posted that thingy on her blog.

That I think back.

Why am I always thinking it's me.

Maybe it's not.

Mayb like she said it's time to think for myself.

Den I started thinking.

Why don't I know how to reject?

Why I just let you all bully me like this.

Why was I always pushedhere&there.

Why is it me? &uptillnow.

I do notknow.

You told me to think. But what to think abt.

IT's all these so called responsibility dragging me down.

I felt so watched.

You wanna control my everything.

I don't feel like a 14-15yearold kid experiencing things I should.

I don't get it.

Why wouldn't you just put this duties on them instead, why me?

WHY DOES EVERY FUCKING HUMANS THINK I CAN DO IT?!?!

Prefect also the same. Thy're always looking out for me.

MEMEMEME! They all thought I would make it to the head prefect.

THEY WAN ME TO TAKE THE FUCKING RESPONSIBILITY!

Is there like this FUCKING aura arnd me thats say, I CAN DO IT! CHOOSE ME!

LIke fuck itlarhhs.

Face thetruthpeople.

I'm NOT that FUCKING PERSON WHO IS SO GREAT!

I can't fucking do alot of things.

I'M JUST A FUCKING 14-15YEAR OLD KID GETTING ON LIFE!

If I'm that FUCKING GREAT PERSON,

WITH FUCKING GREAT ABILITIES TO HAVE THE 10THOUSANDS

RESPONSIBILTIES ON ME!

~~ireallywantogiveup.~~

~~ireallycan'tcarryonlikethis.~~

~~ifeelmymindcollapsing.~~

~~ifeellikei'mwalkingonaneverendingbrokenglasspath.~~

~~tired&sick. ican'tcarryon.~~

~~shoulditellthem?~~

~~delimma.~~

babby,ineedyoutoputthatsmileonmyfaceagain.
i'mtiredofcrying.
withyou,isimplyingforgetallmysadness.
butwhenigethomeijustthinkabttheday&cried.
&wishedthatyouwereherewithme.
sothaticancryonyourshoulder&you'llcomfortme.

~~itmakesmystayonworldallworthitagain.~~

i'mhopeless.&idon'tcareanymore.

Emotional

2010-01-03T00:17:00.008+08:00

This is gonna be another emo post.
&abit hurtful.
So ya. Bear with me kayys.
&sorry if I hurt you&stuff.
But I guess I can be frank once in awhile.

WeiLin:
During the bbq, when you said about pushing the things to you last min.
Do you know that you were not the only one being spammed with the msges
&stuff.
Before that YOU ALL put me the imformant& I was spammed with the msges.
I also dk wad to reply to them stuff.
Did you even think of that.
& the job was also pushed to me last min.
I was so lost. That moment I wanted to just turn away from my phone.
I wanted to act like I did not see all those.
I can take all your jokes.
Each&everyone. But, I just wanna say that b4 you try to say me.
Will you think b4 the job was pushed to you who was it pushed to?
Sorry for this. Really. But Florence's post made me think.

Mdms:
Though I know you wun be reading this but ya.
About the reason&stuff.
Maybe I really need a break.
I don't feel rdy enuff though I know you think I do.
It wasn't that i dun wanna reply to you&stuff.
But i don't know what to reply you den it's ryte.
&when I feel so despair&can't keep my promises,
I rmb your disappointed face from my dreamz.
Maybe I have Been taking this responsibility too heavy.
At times I wish I was not the one you choose.
I rather it be WeiLin or Jiening.
I wish I wasn't the one with all these.
I just can't stand myself disappointing you over&over again.
& you just wun gib up on me.
As I get older.
I feel that my shoulders are getting heavier.
At times I feel I can't even stand up w it.
All of the sudden I feel TKD as a different thing.
Really sorry. But I can't say yes to something I know I can't do.
No matter how much it is going to disappoint you again.

Florence:
Sorry. I'm alr trying my best to think positive&stuff.
But apparently.Things just kept me back to the starting point again.
I also want to be like last time.
Where I'll just talk things out.
But I can't. I feel like I hab to keep the 10thousands secrets.
&stuff. Guess I've been really pulling back.
But I think you're the only one who will see me the way I wished any1 would.
The only one who could understand me w/o me to open my mouth.
The only one who would give me the right advice @ the right time.
THanks.Maybe one day, you'll be my cure when I suffer from depression XD
'cause I'll always think back&say. I can't be like this.
'cause I still hab a friend who truly can understand me.
& THE ONLY FRIEND who enters my mind w/o me knowing.
Thanks alot. iloveyoumorethanicansay, I know this sound wrong but you get it.

Crystal:
I promised you that I'll pick myself up.
But I need you to help me be stronger will you?
I need you to make sure that I stay true to myself.
& stop thinking negatively.
Mayb by the end of the year.
I'll be all smiley by the end of the year.

2010:
Bring me back to 2007&before that.
I wanna noe how smiley I was.
How my smiles seems so wide.
&make sure that I'll be same as last time by the end of this year.
Also make sure I score well for exams will ya?

Sad:
Don't hold me back anymore.
Let me fly free.
Let me learn more about happiness now.
He's getting jealous of me spending too much time on you X)

Happiness:
Tell me you'll stay with me.
Through it all with all the positive things.
Let me experience smiles like I never b4):
I need you.

OKayys. ENDS THIS POST!

Webcam!

2009-12-31T23:04:00.007+08:00

EDITED(: Emo though. PSPS.

ZILIAN-ISM

TookByOtherHumans:

In the Photos:
SmallBoy-YeoMan(IrritatingGuest)
Girl-Primalia(SisterOfYeoMan)
SpecsBoy-Oxford(DUMBDUMB=MyBro)

LostAgain

2009-12-31T22:40:00.004+08:00

I guess things hab been okayys-.-
Humans are back at least.

Things is gonna be short here.
So FastRewinding.

TODAY:
I 'quit' plurk,
Currently on twitter instead.

YESTERDAY(Wed):
Went to parkway.
Played arcade.
Bought shoes&mouse.
Went for bbq, but didn't really feel right there.

TUESDAY:
Completed ChineseLetterWriting.
Cut my hair.
Walked home from FarEast.
Took four hrs arnd.

MONDAY:
Ate porridge.
Stayed home.
Completed BookReview.

SUNDAY:
Celebrated chirstmas @ grandma's.

Geez. Okayys. Should be it.
Gonna post a couple of pics took on webcam-.-

Rawr!

2009-12-21T19:31:00.005+08:00

Hmms. Hmms.

Everybody is so busy overseas):

There isn't going to be any training for the two weeks.

But superb the bored at hm.

Oh I nearly twisted my ankle last trainin):

Kinda injuried myself during iceskatin,WENT TWICE!

& I CAN SKATE, okayys!

HAHAS! I WANNA SAY RAWR!
to * who will never read this until * was told.

I'm having the feelings again.

my phone has been dead& i'm lazy to charge my phone.

Mayb cuz i'm afraid of wad i would face bas.

pick up a knife,

stab it through my heart.

& tell me that everything is going to end.

i've come to the point again,

a point idk wad i'm suppose to do.

heart can you show me the way?

brain plz make sure heart goes the rite way.

cuz pain is enuff, idw go back to the old me.

I'll feel so depressed.

that nite, i cried behind the com.

i didn't noe wad to say.

each time my siblings walked out, i had to act lyk nothign happened.

i felt lyk a retard.

idk whether u were the same but i noe one thing is that.

u can think abt just me&you, but i can't.

i take in ppl's advices& take them seriously.

But it is onli certain ppl.

The ppl are the reason i'm holding back.

but You're nv at my position to know why they are the ppl I'm holding back for.

Lyk I guess i nv did i guess.

You say that it's us. Only my thoughts Yours matters.

But in reality i noe it's not.

Dearest, it's not that easy as u say.

they watched me grow.

they guided through my entire life.

they watched me grow up to where i am now.

they are just lyk another parent to me. they happen to be there for me.

lyk how my other frenz onli that they broke through the barrier.

they saw almost all my crying moments.

my difficult huddles.

everything.

no matter how much you mean to me.

i cannot forgive myself .

for every misery i caused you to hab becuz of them.
each time i'm angry at you i realise that i ended up curling up in bed&crying.

everything. maybe this time i'm holding back not onli becuz of them.

cuz even if you say the part abt me is what u think,

but in actual fact it's not.

i noe wad's going on in this relationship.

It's always me. It should nt be.

i oso hab to think abt u.

It's time, I stop& think.

[*p.s. this is so messy cuz i'm dam bloody confused when typing this.]

SignOff:

Crystal (:
[p.s. rawr!]

Sorrry for such a post agains.

141209

2009-12-12T01:35:00.005+08:00

This is what I think now.

This whole entire week,

I'll be alone.

Everybody is so busy.

& I've no mood to do stuff I'm supposed to.

Trying my best to hold back my tears.

But at time i realise how hard it was.

And I actually had to wait till night,

I'll curl up next to my bobo,

Hide under my blanket,

& cry it out silently.

Tonight, this very moment.

I'm feeling tired of this world.

If I had something sharp here just beside me,

I would probably take it up,

& slash my wrist.

Tat's how I'm tired of life.

That's how sad I am right now.

Ppl say I'm fortunate.

But I never felt so.

Mayb @ times.

That's why I'm living in the hell of heaven.

IT's been a day since you flew.

& it meant I haven't talk to you for 3&half dayz.

At times I wonder if our relationship changed.

Whether your promise is still there.

Why am I even writing this?

You wun even read this.

Just a girl in your world.

The girl you used to treasure.

Everybody is slipping in my grip.

One after another.

Bits&bits broken further.

Tell me I'll pick myself up.

But I know never.

Cuz that's how unimportant I am.

Should I let go? I'll Let god decide. If I don't recieve news by 141209, I'll make my decision.

regardless of how I'm goona regret it.

YoutubeAddict~!

2009-12-09T11:31:00.004+08:00

Dam. I've really bored these dayz-.-

Currently watching maple series on youtube By a producer.

This must hab shown how bored I am -.-

& I haven't been playing Rakion.

Sadist.

Back to life:

Sunday[6/12]:

Wake>Com>Teevee>Com>Bathe>Grandma'sHouse>Eat>Home.

Monday[7/12]:

Wake>Com>Teevee>Out4Porridge>Home>Teevee>PackCupboard>

Bathe>Out2Simei>Challenger>Eat>CDShop>PetShop>Home.

Had a bad day @ home today):

Anyways, dad say he would get me a lappy.

Looks lyk it's gonna happen (:

p.s.happy10thmonthanniversarytome&dearest

Tuesday[8/12]:

Wake>Com>Teevee>Bathe>Out>Project>WS.Pearlyn>Bought.>

Home>Com>Teevee>Slp.

Dam tiring day 2dae.

p.s.happydkhowmanymonthtoflorence&benjamin.

Wednesday[9/12]:

Actually idk what i'm gonna do today. so... nvms.

p.s.happy14thbirthdaytocharmaineng&pohhuiting.

LoveQuotes.

2009-12-05T22:23:00.011+08:00

Random-.- Bored larhhs!

TheSpecialGlowInMe?

2009-12-05T20:45:00.016+08:00

Is this still my world?

Why am I still the glow?

It has been a long time since i last blogged!

Rakion has been fun&stupid w hack(:

Mage lv15 liaos lehhs!

Blacksmith still @ 13):

Archer dun wanna lvl up): Still @ 10.

W hack I play much more stage.

But cannot battle cuz they always say I hack):

But luckily haven tio ban. HAHAS!

Cuz my bro 2 acc-s tio ban liaos. HAHAS!

& the irritating guest e acc oso tio ban. HAHAS!

Only I nv! HAHAS!

Anyways, Life has been boring.

Let me think arhhs.

Wednesday-Saturday[25/11-28/11]:

Usuals. I kinda forgot wad I did-.-

btw. that friday nobody attened training onli seniors-.-

Sunday[29/11]:

Computer e whole day>Eat>Bathe>Change>Com>

Airport[send vaneh off]>home.

Monday[30/11]:

Wake>Facebook>Bathe>Change>SchoolOpenHouse>

Demo>ClubBriefing>ParkwayMeetParents>MetFlo>

Change>WalkWalk>Home>Change>Out4Dinner>Home

Had e worst demo eba! Totally nobody see de.

FUCKING waste my time!

Lousy school, nobody wanna come.

Tuesday[1/12]:

Wake>Facebook>Bathe>OutToMeetMindeSir>GoTm>

MetWeilin>Met-E-Wee-s>MetEBoys>BoughtCoffeeBean>

WaitedForSir>SirCame>Talk.ETC.>

AccompanyWeilinGoInterview>MetTheRest@GV>

SirTreated>WatchedShuaiiGe(:>AccompanyWeiLinBuyThings>

Home>Com>Eat>Teevee>Slp

e annoying guest is back today):

Wednesday[2/12]:

Wake>Com>Eat>Teevee>Com>Eat>DiscussAbtBBQ>

>Com>Eat>Teevee>Bathe>Sleep.

He is occupying muah's computer time.

&freaking noisy!

Thursday[3/11]:

Wake>Com>Bathe>OutMeetWeilin>Bedok>Supermarket>

PP>BubbleTea>Supermarket>PetShop>Supermarket>

SlipperShop>Home>Com>Teevee>Shower>Change>Training>

Discussion>Home.

Had my first night w/o BabyyCarebear):

p.s.gratztoaishah

Friday[4/11]:

Wake>Com>Teevee>Eat>Com>Teevee>Eat>Slp>Com>

Change>Training>DAYOFF):>Discussion>

AccompanyWeilinHome>Chatted>Home>Teevee>Bathe>Slp

e guest is finally gone. PEACE!

Had a bad day today):

Saturday[5/11]:

Wake>Com>Teevee>Bathe>Out>WaitedForDearest>

TrainedToVivo>BoughtTicket4NewMoon>Subway>

Movie):>CoffeeBean>WalkWalk>Trained>Bus-ed>

Home>Eat>Com>Blog.

Today was AWESOME!&not.

Awesome: Finally Met My DEAREST! Ahhs~

Not: e Movie Sucked! What Made it Sucked Even more.

We Were surrounded by a group of english ppl! Stupid accent!

Dam bloody noisy too!

Okayy, this is one of the ShuaiiGe from e movie. [Very hard to find others sia]

He in the show dam cool de lorhhs. Rarely smile-.-

Okayy~ Updated~!

Buaiis~

ialwayswonderedwhy&wasaskedabtitytd.

stillnoanswer.

CheerUpGirls!

2009-11-24T20:34:00.011+08:00

I'm plurking(:

HAHAS!

Anyway these days nv do much):

Did the usuals at home.

Sat:

PlayCom.>Ate.>Blog.>Com.>Teevee.>Bathe.>Com.>Out[MeetSuman@tm]

.>SokaHQ.>Ate@mac.>YouthWalk>Dinner@cc.>Home

The youth walk dam fun but stupid larhhs!

Firstly they stared us late by one hr.

But we Still had to finish everything by 1945.

We didn't win prize but overall was fun(:

The performances was great.

Food was average.

But very very tiring.

Especially the day b4 had training.

Sunday:

Play Com.>Grandma.>Whitesands.>Home.

Monday:

Com.>Downstairs Breakfast wif fam.>Com.>Bathe>Suntec>

Dinner@kuishinbo>home

p/s. iskippedtrainingtoday!

Tues[today]:

Com>MagiMee[Breakfast]>Com>Teevee>Com>Eat>

FeedHamsters>Blog>Bathe>Com(:

I cannot finish my Holidays by this month):

So nnvms.

I'll do the rest 2weeks b4sch reopens!

Next Monday having open house):

Sad Sia!

Nothiing else liaos.

maybeattimesitisbettertoletgo,nomatterhowitis.

inoeit'shardtopullyourselftgt.bothofyouaremyfriend.

bothfacingthesameplight.ayearishardtoletgobutifitdrags

thingsmightgetworse.anyways,wadevaitisyoualwayshavefriends.

whtheriamornot,i'llalwaystrytobetereforyou!

CHEERUPGURLS!NOTHINGTOOHARDTODO!

LoveJustHurtsTooMuch.

LettingItGo

2009-11-21T11:43:00.004+08:00

Ah~

I'm going out l8r.

Go for dk wad Youth walk.

Can't wait to hab the fun & forget wad has happened.

I noe that as much as you are disappointed what I have said ytd,

It took me a lot of courage to say that.

Maybe because I'm losing the interest.

Or it's just full of excuses that I haven't done a good job.

But I guess I hang on long enuff.

You told me to think abt it.

But idk wad is there to think.

If I were to be kicked out of class lyk this.

Then I'll let it be.

I used to think I could carry on Because of you.

I looked up to you.

I thought I could be that strong.

But I guess I'm not that mentally yet.

Yaya. Enuff of my blabbering.

I give up. Not because I'm weak. But I'm strong enuff to let it go.

Not to mention this.

8 years. 8years.

It just when down the drain.

idkhowtofaceyou.

maybeiwunevenwantogotothechaletanymore.& training

MiniLappyPls!

2009-11-20T08:58:00.003+08:00

I can't believe I actually waited at whitesands for my family, ytd.

FOR A WHOLE FREAKING OF 4 HRS!

haiz.

I went to sch ytd, for tkd training.

We were doing demo for the STUPID BUDGET OPENHOUSE!

The demo was stupid because we couldn't do anything nice.

After training do the achievement thingy so budgetly.

While waiting for sir as he goes RP wif his stuff wif me.

Den help sir transfer his psp stuff.

Den he rush to RP agains.

It was by den raining heavily-.-

Called my parents to fetch me.

Den I thought onli my mother nid to bathe den come fetch me.

But no.

In the end my parents bought my dumbdumb bro to the doc for his cold sore.

den buy food to bring auntie candy's(Florence's mum) house.

den fetch my sis from home den onli to come & find mie):

i'm so sad):

Becuz Of that i walked dk how many rounds of whitesands n see the how many ppl walked past me.

When they come fetch me, they onli buy cake-.-

Den off we go to see florence(:

Dad gt a little bit lost, but we found our way(:

Had a great time & home sweet home(:

Haiz, i wanna get that mini lappy.

I noe it's not good but it's cheaper so my dad could afford it.

I can't bear him to spend a thousand dollars on a lappy for me.

Cuz my bro would nid his for his poly soon, real soon):

& he say he wanna save money to bring us to Taiwan during chinese new year.

Dearest say he broke his lappy LCD screen ytd):

& he dk how.

He got a bad lashing.

& I did not say anything.

Haiz, I oso dk wad to say to him.

So much things happen.

Movies

2009-11-18T15:50:00.005+08:00

Wee~ I'm blogging agains.
very bored larhhs.
nothing to do.
Since because of the stupid mouse, I can't play Rakion):
& I totally have no mood to do mie hws):

Anyway, mie bro downloaded movies(:
so I'm watching it nows(:
hahas! howilovehim(
bleahs, overmydeadbody.
hahas.

I see that my dad's home,
I guess he is going to use the com soon.
I shall stop blogging now.
Since i also dun have anything to do ):

Uncompleted:
4BookReview[trying to do the 1st bk de mindmap]
ChineseCompo
ChineseLetterWriting
2MathsPaper
GeographyWithAishah
OutingsWith6/1'07
OutingsWithFlorence
OutingsWithZhaoHua&HuiTing
OutingsWithAishah&Amirah
OutingWithPeeps.
OutingWithSuMan.

Wow, That is so much.
& to be completed by 31st dec-.-

Buaiis. No complains or rantings today(:

Lost

2009-11-17T10:50:00.007+08:00

DAMN!

I can't play rakion with a wired mouse):

It restricts my movement too much):

& my stupid wireless mouse has some prob wif me!

It wouldn't let me att with the left button):

I'mma sad.

Haiz.

Den I shall get to my hw ):

lykfkitalr.stopthefuckingtorturelarhhs!

ihatelife!

GrandmaRawks!

2009-11-16T18:41:00.003+08:00

I'm home(:

Hahas... Went out to celebrate mie grandma's birthday(:

70 liaos lehhs.

She dam power larhhs.

I nv knew she could sing dam well Larhhs.

Now I knew where the genes come from. hahas!

Anyway, I setted off at 1030 though it was suppose to be 1010 instead.

But my mum was so slow, Den my dad, den my bro.

What a piss-.-

After that we went to fetch my Xiaoyi&Popo(aunt&grandma[mother's side])

We were late as My BiaoYi(aunt) booked a K-box @ downtown @ 11.

We were there 10mins late I think.

But my Dayi(big aunt) and uncle whom idk what to address him-.-

Was even later-.-

They spent a hell lot of them figuring the machine and the correct songs they actually wanted-.-

How dumb was it?

In the end I and my Biaoyi did most of the figuring while they sing-.-

& my Xiaoyi dam funny larhhs.

Because my mummy arhhs she always say the song not hers den in the end she is the 1 singing-.-

den my Xiaoyi voice kana cover den she make a joke lorhhs.

So dam stupid larhhs!

Den everytime my Popo sing I thought the singer singing lorhhs-.-

she sing dam bloody high&loud lorhhs-.-

Can compete with the speakers sia.

She so power.

(btw, the food there sucks!)

After that @ 1405 we catch 2012!

WITHOUT MY OLDER SIS WHO WANTED TO WATCH!

Hahas, I'm so ebvil!

Thh show dam touching larhhs.

Though the Obama in the show is so dam bloody old.

We departed as we needed to rush home as my bro got his prom nite @ 7-.-

At home, He called his friends what is smart casual wear-.-

dam rites?

Tell him google it liaos dun wan.

He also just tell us. Okayy I,

Just told them thht the dress code was smart casual wear-.-

We totally forgot abt it today.

& panicked to find clothes.

I chose one shirt for him and asked him to try but couldn't fit-.-

(It was My dad's)

We flipped the entire closet just to find 1 that just isn't good enuff.

Next was his jeans-.-

He couldn't fit in it all the sudden-.-

We flip ALL his jeans just to find one that fits.

Then We packed him extra set of clothes just in case his clothes tore-.-

Then we went downstairs to Make his hair to look smart enuf!

What a busy day today!

somehowalthoughitwaswiththeadultsienjoyedthehelllotoftimewiththem.

maybbecuzwecouln'tcommunicatewellsotherewasn'tanythingbutpeace.

ienjoyedtoday!

GoodGirlToday

2009-11-15T15:18:00.006+08:00

I'mma good kid todayy(:

I'm doing homework(:

Okayy, it's after playing Rakion for the whole morning.

Wee~ You know what.

My Rakion Charc, IN33DYOU[Blacksmith] & M00N[Star][Mage] levelled up!

Though now both only level 11-.-

Sorry, I know you are not interested in this.

I also created aa new charc(:

Star[M00N][Arch]

& the stupidest thing is I don't how to use it's chaos):

Okayy, Crystal stop it.

SERIOUSLY!

Back to homework(:

Yesterdayy, I spent the whole day doing quizzes.

Okayy night.

I did finish Physics (I think I failed 3, out of 6-.-)

Alot of anyhow-do also correct(:

I also did finish my english quizzes(:

All full marks lehhs!

Except the fill in the blanks.

2 wrongs(:

Now I hate that I failed so much paper in EOY.

I could get into E3 & not attend EBH's class!

Haiz. If only I was more careful.

I just did finish History.

Like just.

Now taking a break before continuing to My english compo(:

ToDoListBeforeNovemberEnds:

EBH's class to END SOON!

ChineseCompo&LetterWriting To Be Done!

EnglishCompo

BookReviews!

Geography With Aishah!

MeetUp With SuMan!

ToDoListBeforeHolidaysEnd:

Calm Myself Down.

OUT WITH FLORENCE!

OUT WITH ZHAOHUA MEI!

OUT WITH HUITING MEI!

OUT WITH PEEPS!

6/1'07 GATHERING![HopeSo]

OUT WITH DEAREST!

NEWMOON!

~~i'msotired.~~

~~ithinkineedabreakfromeverything.~~

~~closeyourseyes.~~

~~throweverythingaway.~~

~~beforeyouknow,~~

~~everythingisover.~~

BoomxzToday

2009-11-14T10:59:00.003+08:00

I'mma so bored.

Hahas...

Yesterday training was okayy I guess.

Nothing much.

Though MdmNo.2 came and MdmNo.1 Is in Cambodia.

Same old things.

Had a long chat after class as usual.

Oh,Oh,Oh.

Weilin come back liaos...

I'mma going to push everything to her(:

Today is so boringz.

Me Wanna go outs.

I wonder whether Weilin has gone for her job interview.

Hmms...

Nvms... I shall go back to play Rakion With my noob bro.

Hahas...

At times I just sit down and think about something.

And it happens that it would always brings tears.

I think I'm not well.

Not Okayy.

At times I just wish I could shut myself from the world.

~~Left alone in this world,~~

~~Nobody cared.~~

ExplanationTime

2009-11-13T14:02:00.002+08:00

It's friday agains.

Idk what am I going to do.

I fear for the repeat.

I think I need a break.

I can't carry like this.

I need to run,

Calm myself down.

I fear I would break down again.

I got lots of explaining to do today.

But I dun feel lyk talking about it.

I wish I could turn back the clock.

Where everything was still there.

Trying really hard to work for my goal.

But now it seems different.

I did work hard for what I wanted but it did not come out that way.

Then now I dun noe whether I should carry on working hard when the outcome is lyk that.

I used to have great interest in it.

But just a few of it without her.

I let her down greatly.

I dun noe how to carry on,

How to face her.

I just dun know what to do anymore.

Mayb I just need to stop and think.

Mayb I was never suitable for it.

Lyk I lost it.

Sorry for the rantings.

But it just had to be blogged.

iviewthepicturesoncemore.

butnowtheyaredifferent.

theirsmiledissappearinmyhand.

theyneverunderstoodmypointofview.

sorry,iguessichosetogaveupagain.

ps, happy14thmonthtochramaine&iggy.

pss, happy14thbirthdaytojordon.

PicturesInHongkong

2009-11-12T19:47:00.000+08:00

Bought hair accessory(:

Big Candy Floss!

Smoke

Still Smoke

Fireworks+smoke+lighting

Me& Noisy Olivia

Dumbdumb&me. Mirror & DLhollywoodhotel

In Eaton Hotel

Shared Room wif bro -.-

Guanyin

BabyyCarebear In HONGKONG!

Daddy&Me Eating Ice-cream

DaJie

DumbDumb... HAHAS!

Edited. e Back Ground is actually fireworks-.-

more to come... IN FACEBOOK!

Brandnew

2009-11-12T19:08:00.001+08:00

Finally, I wanted to quit blogging but neverminds.

Anyway, I just came back from hongkong ytd.

Everything was fine.

The trip was okayy(:

Pics I try to post soon larhhs...

Anyway, I just hope this new blog would mean brand new start.

~~I can't believe i cried in front of them.~~

I really just don't wanna disappoint you all.
at times i just think that i'm that fantastic
lyk you all say i was.
i was a normal kid to begin wif.
that those with responsibilities was not me.
but i was the chosen one.
it just had to be.
at times i just wish i could giveup.

~~mayb i alr did...~~